As we’ve just celebrated Thanksgiving in the USA, it’s a great time to set your intentions while being in the energy of thanks and gratitude.
I wanted to take this opportunity to share some of my tips of to do if you have relationship or overwhelm issues around the holidays. Of course, it’s better to heal the energy behind these patterns, but until then, these tips can make a huge difference by giving you have some strategies to use to protect yourself.
There are always ways that you can be triggered during the holidays. I know with me the negative conversations usually started with one of my big blunders or a recollection of one of my bad experiences which everyone would have a big laugh about, but I didn’t think it was funny or appropriate. For years I got sucker punched by these but then I learned about deflecting. Deflecting is amazingly simply and works 95% of the time. When someone brings up something you don’t want to talk about or a topic that you know will go in the wrong direction, have a topic that you can quickly take people to without missing a beat. Initially I thought people would realize what’s happening, but they never do. They go right where you lead them. You can use this throughout the day with ease and soon you’ll find you leave an event without feeling bad about yourself. Those deflections could be about a sporting event, a vacation plan, a child’s event, a current movie, etc. Just come armed with a bunch of those and use them as needed.
2. Come later and don’t stay so long
People have the habit of staying at these family events far longer than is necessary. After a while things just ‘naturally’ go to the bad side. Possibly because of the over-indulging that is normally associated with the holidays. Have a good reason as to why you can’t be there early and then leave while things are still on a happy note. Only talk about happy occasions and experiences that you are having. Do NOT mention any unpleasantness because people will want to drill down on that. Keep conversations light and easy. Talk about their interests even if you don’t like them if you can’t think of anything else. This is about self-protection and keeping calm, peaceful and confident.
3. Set limits
Prior to getting to where you are going or if you are expecting company, prior to their arrival, set limits on what you will be doing, saying and sharing. So much of what you experience at these types of events is based on your intention. If you don’t have any, then anything can happen. Set the intentions of what you will allow for yourself and what you want to have happen.
Take good care of yourself during the holidays. Treat yourself to things that feel good. It could be a walk in the park, a hot bath, hot chocolate, watching old movies — you name it, but try to treat yourself each day to at least one thing that gives you a good and happy feeling. The more, the better!
5. Choose to be happy
I like to start each day where I announce to the Universe that I choose to be happy. Let me tell you quite frankly. The days I ‘forget’ to do that start to go wonky very quickly. Choose what you want to feel and experience for each day.
It’s your life and your choice. Choose wisely.